Excuses

I don't even know where I stand with this whole "blogging" thing anymore. My life this past school year has been consumed with finding out who my real friends are, and I think I may have found it in a group of girls who I think know me better then I even know myself. I'm so content with the life that I'm leading as of now, It's a beautiful kind of contentment. Not the kind that causes you not to grow as a person. Not the kind that leads you to be too complacent. Just the feeling that everything is balanced and all is well in my own little world.

I'm hoping to start blogging a lot this summer. Hopes aren't always realized, but I feel as if my hiatus needs to be done and why not start the summer before my sophomore year?

I hope all is well with everyone. I hope that someone is going to be here to read all of this. Having that said, I understand that a lot of people who used to read all this junk have probably moved on as well, but who knows, I could come to be pleasantly surprised :)

It's begining to feel an awful lot like Christmas

The weather is miserable, I thought I was ready for sweaters and uggs but I was very wrong. I miss my summer dresses. I also miss beachy waves....I'm at that stage where all you want is for your hair to grow, you know when you tug on it constantly as if that'd help it to grow any longer.

Thank you Dakotah and fam!

Thanksgiving was absolutely wonderful. Both my parents had to work so my friend Dakotah and her beyond amazing family invited me to come with them to have thanksgiving with their family. We played games and ate yummy food. I've found that i really like seeing how other families do things. You always feel that warm family love during the holidays....I just hope everyone gets to feel that.


What are your families holiday traditions? No matter what Holiday you celebrate!

infinite x's and o's,
Raigan


Currently listening to: Belle of the Bouelevard by: Dashboard confessional
Dancing with Myself by: Billy Idol

I'm gonna miss this

I will miss football season. One more game? Really guys, where does time go?

Hope you're lives have been filled with love and joy...I'm getting there

-Raigan

Listening to: Cholesterol by Alexander

You're Hardly Alive by Darien

What I Love Wednesday: Cupcakes and TOMS

Does loving cupcakes, especially Halloween themed ones, really need to be justified?

I went to a talk on campus on Tuesday night given by Blake Mycoskie, the founder of TOMS shoes. It definitely made me think about how I would like to run a business someday. The passion he had for his business was inspiring, and I hope that someday I can have that much love for a cause and business. It was awesome to hear how TOMS became successful almost overnight, and now they've surpassed their goal of 250 by far.

TOMS are shoes that you buy and then the company gives a pair to a child in need. It's not just another charity, TOMS makes sure that the people that get their shoes also get new pairs as they grow out or wear out the shoes. Buy a pair. Give a TOMS gift card for Christmas. Give a TOMS for tots pair as a baby gift. Give a gift card to a teacher for teacher appreciation day. Give a gift card to that person who has everything.

buy. TOMS!

-Raigan

What I Love Wednesdays: Fall

The weather is just right, cool enough for flannel and leggings but warm enough that you don't have to break out a coat larger then most little kids. Trees you never noticed on your daily drives have erupted in color. The anticipation for Halloween and thanksgiving start to build with constant reminders in almost every store. Your local pumpkin patch finally opens and you get to re-live being 5 again. It's the best season of all, at least I'm pretty sure. Here, it's pretty chilly most days but as Missouri always does, the temperature changes on a dime to about 80 degrees Fahrenheit. For now, I'll enjoy watching my little brother run around in leaves and pumpkin patches. Soon, snow will cover the ground and trips to the park won't be as accessible, but I hope the little guy isn't too heartbroken.

-Raigan

She wants to do her own thing and she doesn't care if anyone is watching

Yo party people...

So, I've been in a smidgen of a rut. Actually, a rather large rut. That's alright though, because coming out of it has been really good and I'm feeling content and happy again. Maybe that means my blogging will be coming back! I have an idea that's going to push me to my creative limits blogging wise and it'll consume large amounts of time. I think that's what I need, to be occupied I mean. The more I'm bored and alone the more I think scary things. I'm going to try and be surrounded by those I love, and just take things one day at a time. Observing all the wonderful things I've been blessed with. Tell me four things you're thankful for....

1. CAMERAS 2. LOVE 3. BOOKS 4. HEATING/AIR CONDITIONING

I love you :)

-Raigan

Where the Wild Things Are

Homecoming was fun, I don't have hardly any pictures though. I know that's a little shocking considering you know....who I am....but still I just wasn't in a photographic mood.

This weekend has been a little odd. I'm thinking about life...my goals, who I am, the choices I make. All of this has been brought about by something that freaks me out and breaks my heart all at once. I just hope that if someday anyone reading this is considering suicide, that you think twice. That you tell somebody who will help you. That you don't do it.

I don't know how I feel about suicide...really, I don't. As a Catholic, I'm told that I'm supposed to believe that it's wrong, that the Lord has a plan for life and death and it is not our place to mess with it. As myself, I understand having emotions so clouded that it seems like a good idea to end pain at the time, to just stop everything. From the perspective of "what if it were my family member" I cannot imagine so much hurt or so many questions left after a life that will never, and can never, be answered. I would like to say I believe it's cowardly or that I believe that it's wrong or that I think it's selfish, but I just cannot. I believe in a merciful Lord, one who understands human suffering...so I also cannot believe that that Lord would view it as horrible. I can't bring myself to define a person who is obviously in intense emotional pain as selfish. I cannot make myself believe that it's wrong, when clearly at least one person views it as the only thing that's right.

Your thoughts? Please?

-Raigan

p.s. I'm not considering suicide, just to clarify